“Someone who’s got what you’ve got is out doing what you’re not” -Anonymous

Have you ever wondered why people whom you view as less talented or less intelligent than you excel more than you do? You look at them and shake your head wondering how they achieved more than you when you know that you’re better than them. I used to have those conversations with myself all of the time. I would say, “I can write better than that person, but she has a book deal or I’m smarter than that person, but they have a higher paying job than me.” Whenever someone I viewed as less qualified would share their plans with me, I’d smile, but deep down inside I’d be thinking there’s no way this person can accomplish this because they don’t have what it takes. Much to my surprise, this person would achieve their goals and much more. I used to think that life was unfair and these kinds of people were given breaks that eluded me until the day I took a leap of faith and chased after my dreams like they stole something! While earnestly pursuing my dreams of becoming a motivational speaker and author—exercising my God-given talents—I stumbled across the “secret” to my peers’ success.

I could’ve hit myself over top of the head when I realized that the “secret” isn’t a secret at all. It’s so obvious that many, including me, tend to over analyze it and totally miss the point. Nike whispers the secret every time  you watch one of its commercials or see someone wearing a Nike t shirt that reads “Just do it!” Yes, just do it. That is the key to my “less qualified peers’” success and the key that will unlock those initial doors of your success.

Have you ever noticed that many self proclaimed perfectionists haven’t accomplished much although they are the smartest and most talented people you know? You figure that they should be much more successful with all of their intelligence and skills. Have you also noticed that the people who are less talented have accomplished more than anyone could’ve ever imagined? The major difference between these two groups of people is in their execution—nothing more. The problem that I and many people who are self proclaimed perfectionists have is that we need everything to be perfect in order for us to execute our plans. We’ll brainstorm, research and strategize, but won’t pull the final lever because something’s not right; the timing, the circumstances, the concept—all is not perfect.

I used to be a perfectionist who waited for the perfect time and circumstances before I would act. The only problem was I never acted because the timing or circumstances were never perfect. “If only this were right, then I’ll do that,” I’d reason with myself time after time, unknowingly talking myself out of my blessings. It wasn’t until I listened to God’s leading and created http://www.shalenadiva.com, that I realized how deceitful perfection can be. The deception of perfection, as I like to refer to it, is nothing more than fear dressed up in Gucci wearing some killer Christian Loubotin pumps—nothing more. This notion of perfection will hinder you from launching out and pursuing your dreams because you’ll never start anything to bring it to fruition.

When I started this blog, I had no foreknowledge of how to run a blog or the technical aspects of creating one. For someone who prides themselves on knowing everything, this experience was scary and humbling for me because I had to admit that I didn’t know everything and search out answers from others. Most perfectionists have a problem with that, but I’m glad that God helped me to recognize it as fear of failing and to overcome it. I had to totally trust God and he supplied ALL my needs along the way. Just before my website launched on April 30, 2010, I still had misgivings because it wasn’t perfect and the perfectionist in me needed it to be perfect. Looking back, I realize that it was fear of my blog not being well received that had me anxious. I considered pulling the plug on it before God spoke to me and told me that my blog was fine as it was and it was meant to be a blessing to others. At that point I got completely out of the way and launched the blog. I hate to use clichés, but the rest is history. My blog has grown by leaps and bounds in a short period of time and people are being blessed by it. I eat, sleep, and breathe this blog. I’m always trying to make it better each day which leads me to the main point of this article.

Don’t set out to be perfect because this mindset will stifle your efforts every time. Set out to execute your plans and learn to perfect them along the way. If you stop by my blog often, you’ll always notice a tweak here and there. I’m constantly stepping up my game and perfecting this blog. I guess this is the only time my perfectionist nature comes in handy. It won’t let me settle for being mediocre and it keeps me on my toes, the cutting edge. Being a perfectionist isn’t a bad thing when you know when to hone in on perfection and when to simply execute which can be the scariest part. To me, constantly perfecting my blog is a matter of finesse, but executing my vision for the blog takes courage and faith.

Had I got caught up in this notion of perfection, I would have never launched the blog because it wasn’t perfect enough when I first started it. I had no idea that in the midst of God using me to create my blog, he was also teaching me a life lesson that will help me to achieve greater success. He taught me that He would meet me along the way as I executed the plans He put in my heart.

Lastly, the following Bible scripture really encourages me to keep following my dreams: “Do you see the man who excels in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before unknown men.” Proverbs 22: 29. This scripture lets me know that if I keep honing my craft and perfecting it along the way, I will be very successful and so will you if you constantly develop your talents by acting upon your plans. If you want to become a writer, keep writing and learning the craft. If you want to become a singer, keep singing and training your voice. You have to start somewhere and you have to keep perfecting your skills.

Don’t plan to be perfect. Plan to execute and perfect along the way.

Be Blessed,

ShalenaD.I.V.A

P.S.- Remember everything has beauty, including YOU. It just takes a true D.I.V.A to see it!

© 2011 – 2013, Shalena D.I.V.A.- Author| Speaker| Life And Business Coach. All rights reserved.

45 comments on “The Perfectionist by ShalenaD.I.V.A”

  1. Thanks for sharing this, Shalena. I really needed to read this. I too have had a major problem with stepping out on faith and executing my plans and Godns plans for my life . . . But not anymore. Thanks.

  2. Quiana and Sam, thank you for taking out the time to read my article. I thank God that you found it helpful. I’m gald that I went through this experience and am able to let everyone know that they can be sucess if they let go of the fear that binds them. many sisters who have it going on call themselves perfectionists who miss out on many blessings because they are waiting for everything to be perfect in order to act. But that’s only fear playing tricks on them. God will supply your needs along the way.

    Be blessed! Thanks again for the kind words. Be on the lookout for more inspirational articles from me.

    • LaShawne, thank you for the kind words! Your opinion matters to me. I’m glad you enjoyed this article. I’m going to share your response. I’ll be talking to you soon. Let’s get it!

  3. Shalena,

    This was absolutely awesome. Thanks for helping the “perfecter” in me. This article is so true. Sometimes we forget that whenever God gives us a vision he also equips us ahead of time. Often times we compare ourselves to other people not knowing how that person went through the process. I’m thankful you listened to God and ran with your vision. You are a blessing to me as well as many others.

    Keep Listening to God..
    Be Blessed,

    EB White

    • Hey, Elaine! God has a special plan for each of us that no one can take away from us. What God has for you is truly for you because only you can bring it to pass. God chose you to be the vessel. That helps me to keep things in perspective. Also, this situation taught me that God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness. He takes control when we yield which will yield us great rewards and blessings in all forms.

      You are a blessing to me and I appreciate all that you do. Keep letting your light shine.

  4. Wow, I don’t consider myself a perfectionist however I admire the way you decribed fear or a facet of it , like Christian in some type of pumps, apparently I don’t wear pumps anymore so I’m out of touch. I did get the point. I told God I don’t know how to begin writing the books inside of me. I’ve been writing for years, in my journal and poetry to myself. I just released one on my poems about 2 years ago. I carried them in a book store at the Tri State Mall, they didn’t move so I gave them away as gifts. That was my start. The title of the peom is “The Interior Decorator”. I wrote it in 1991. It has copy writes so I felt comfortable releasing it to the world. You said just do it. I’ve never had a problem writing or speaking but I know I need God to inspire me to write. I’m interested only in true life experiences and some of what I want to share just aint pretty. It could be offensive especially to “leaders” in the “Christian” community, not that I give 2 flying flutes by I’m just saying. I still don’t know where to begin. I’ve already attempted and I just got stuck, froze, couldn’t continue. I don’t even remember where I stopped. I don’t really want to reflect on my past. I choose to move forward and there maybe my dilemma. So what do you think?

  5. Well, first of all flutes don’t fly, unless you’re throwing them, and second of all just put aside a journal just for this project alone. Go to it everyday and ask God for the words to say. Every step is a leap of faith, it’s your journey, it’s not right or wrong, whether good or bad, it’s yours to dare to share, Just do it! Begin writing your story for His glory.
    How about that?
    One Friendly Christian to another

    • FRiendly Christian, my best advice for writing is to be authentic and start writing about what you know. I’m realizing that God has allowed us to go through circumstances and situations to be blessings to others by sharing how we overcame. You must deal with your past and find the beauty in it. Your past experiences ahve made you who you are.

      I have provided a platform here for women to share their personal stories and knowledge with others. I hope more people take advantage of this opportunity. I strongly suggest writing for this blog to get in the habit of writing and sharing your work on a consistent basis. You don’t have to write a book, just your thoughts or about a specific experience that can help others. The more you write, the more you exercise your writing gift. Some women feel more comfortable using a pen name and that’s fine, too. But they’re getting their stories out and getting delivered. Some of the articles were written by women who’ve never told anyone how they truly felt about a particular situation yet they trusted me enough to share their true story with the world.

      If you ever want to share your story on this website, please contact me via the contact form and let me know. We can take it from there.

      Writing is a spiritual journey and it’s an inside job.

  6. Acting is right, but Grams schooled me many moons ago that thier is a tooth space btwn acting & not acting…

  7. @All–that used to be me. I would wait for th perfect time and the perfect circumstances, but guess what? The perfect time NEVER comes. You have to step out on faith and act. God will provide all the resources. I am a witness! Just go for it. But I will also add that you can’t allow the fear of failing to hinder you either. In the beginning of every endeavor, you will most likely fail. But I view failure differently than most people. I view it as a learning lesson I need to master for what I’m trying to achieve. Fail as fast as you can in the beginning. Get it out of the way. I don’t take failing personally anymore. I feel some kind of way for a minute then I get over it!

  8. im liking your web site the catogorys and etc….I also write books Im starting me a book assocciation aswell… my frist book is called the free-est walk to freedom, my value is toons of footwork, maybe the collabing wth other branded book assocciation

  9. im liking your web site the catogorys and etc….I also write books Im starting me a book assocciation aswell… my frist book is called the free-est walk to freedom, my value is toons of footwork, maybe the collabing wth other African branded book assocciation….

  10. OUCH! Stepped over ALL ten of my li’l toes with this! I am definitely guilty of overthinking..Fear is also a FACTOR..Gotta make some changes…

  11. Let me tell you something. Some many of the things I do today, I am scared as crap, but I do them anyway, usually holding my breath! And guess what? It’s not that bad after all. Each time, I gain more confidence to speak up and try new things. You have to step out on faith and either two things will happen, you’ll sprout wings or crash and burn. I want to sprout wings. We are stronger, more creative, and more intelligent than we’ll ever know. But you’ll never know that until you try. Just do it!

  12. When you take one step, God IS always a few steps ahead preparing your path. Fear Is of the devil! God didn’t give us a spirit of fear!! I AM MORE THEN A CONQUEROR, I CAN DO ALL THINGS THRU CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME

  13. woops didn’t mean to hit enter yet…lol but I am guilty of having fear & not stepping out on faith. don’t know why exactly but i must have something that people need or want to hear that the devil is hindering me from doing/saying. i am learning slowly but surely that I need to act & step out on faith. like nike says just do it! this is my prayer. Thanks for this post it is a confirmation!

  14. Such a true statement….my B- azz is gonna go to bed before someone in the Mile High finds me out….rofl

  15. Wow what an eye opener. thank you. right now I am unemployed and trying to find ways to make things happen. Sometimes i grow weary but I will now try to formulate a plan to start small and grow from there. thanks

    • Julie, I’m glad this article was able to help you. Sometimes, we have to start small and grow from there. Think of trees and plants, they don’t start out as the great oaks we come to know, they start out as a small seed. keep at it. Doors will open for you!

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