Have you ever had someone in your life, whether it is a parent, sibling, or lover who constantly encourages you to do something positive in your life? Deep down inside, you know that they are right. You know that you need to make some moves in your life. You know you need to get off your butt and get that G.E.D. You know you need to look for a job. You know you need to go back to school to get your degree. You know you need to lose weight and become more active. And to be quite honest, you really don’t need your loved ones constantly reminding you of these things.
One day you wake up and something clicks in your head. You make a decision to achieve whatever it is you’ve been putting off for whatever reasons. You sign up for that G.E.D. class, you join a gym, you go on an interview, you start moving in the right direction. You are proud of yourself for taking those first crucial steps towards a brighter future. But that same person who had been encouraging you to get yourself together suddenly starts acting funny. They are distant. They are not excited about what you’re doing. They make excuses for why they can’t help you. You don’t want to believe it, but it seems like they are hating on you for finally getting your act together. You may not tell them this, but you are crushed. Where is the support you expected them to show you? Shouldn’t they be happy for you, especially since you followed their advice?
In my experiences, I have found that some people want you to need them and they become threatened when you start making moves that will make you less dependent upon them. It’s like they are content when you are sad and depressed and constantly remind you that you can do better—saying that they are coming from a place of love. But they flip the script when you start applying their advice.
Has this ever happened to you? What was the situation? How did you deal with their lack of support? Did it change your relationship? Do you see this unsupportive person in a new light? What advice would you give to someone who is currently in this situation?
© 2014, Shalena D.I.V.A. – Author| Speaker| Life And Business Coach. All rights reserved.