Don’t judge me!

Don’t judge me because my hair is not as straight or curly as yours.

Don’t judge me because my tracks are showing!

Don’t judge me because I’m lighter or darker than you!

Don’t judge me because my lips are a bit fuller than yours!

Don’t judge me because my breasts are more voluptuous than yours!

Don’t judge me because my stomach and love handles are spilling over my jeans!

Don’t judge me because the crack of my butt is showing!

Don’t judge me because my clothes are too tight from top to bottom!

Don’t judge me because I dress like a boy!

Don’t judge me because I don’t speak like you!

Don’t judge me because I cuss loud in public!

Don’t judge me because my attitude stinks!

Don’t judge me because I skip school and my grades aren’t good!

Don’t judge me because I walk down the street smoking weed!

Don’t judge me because I’m promiscuous!

Don’t judge me because I have 3 babies by three different men!

Don’t judge me because my mom is a “crack head” and my dad is in jail!

I’m sick of being looked at like I’m trash by my own race of people!

I’m sick of being talked about by people who look just like me!

Older people turn their lips up at me!

I wonder about these people who look at me like I’m trash, talk about me, and turn their lips up at me. Why do they look at me with such disgust? What are they hiding? What was their childhood and teenage years like? Do you really want to know what my life is like? No, because you haven’t asked! I pretend I don’t care but deep down inside it hurts, saddens and angers me when I’m treated this way! When I look in the mirror I hate myself! I feel like I’m nobody and this is what I have to look for, for the rest of my life. Is this really what life is really about? At times I think this world would be better off without me! I wonder what life would be like if there was no me. I’m worthless, at least that’s how I feel….So I act exactly the way I’m portrayed!

More often than not many of us have either been in these shoes, prejudged on these basis or both. Ironically we are judging or being judged by women and young women who look exactly like us. Many times we look at one another with disgust. We talk about each other and tear one another down with damaging words. Some of us forget where we are and where we came from. If it wasn’t for the Lord who was on my side where would I be? That’s what I think at times when I look in the mirror. I’ve walked in one or more of these shoes at one point in my life, constantly being pre-judged. Aren’t we (African Americans) supposed to build, encourage and strengthen one another?  Many times there are underlying reasons why our woman and young woman fall in different situations. There are many underlying reasons why our attitudes are the way they are.

WE LEARN WHAT WE LIVE! Think about it we don’t come into the world with a bad attitude. We don’t grow up saying we want to have 3 babies with 3 men! And we sure don’t grow up saying we want our mother to be on drugs and our father to be in jail. We learn these things from our environment and ultimately portray these things.

BUT GOD!!!! Women, young and old, your circumstance do not define you. YOU ARE FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE! YOU ARE THE APPLE OF GOD’S EYE! YOU ARE UNIQUE AND THERE IS NO ONE LIKE YOU IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD.  YOU’RE WORTHY AND WORTH IT! If ever you are feeling like you’re a nobody, sad, lonely, or depressed please know that you are not alone and that God wants the very best for you. He’s only a prayer away and he’s waiting with his arms stretched wide.

Before you open your mouth to judge anyone, look in the mirror….BUT GOD!

Remember words hurt and could potentially kill. Once you speak something negative you are unable to take it back. The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. (Proverbs 18:21 NIV) SPEAK LIFE!

Remember whose you are and who you are!

Be Blessed,

EB White

Elaine Broaster-White is the mother of two wonderful, intelligent children and the wife of the most perfect husband, whose absolutely perfect for her. But most importantly she is a child of the King, the most High God, Jesus Christ.

© 2012, Shalena D.I.V.A.- Author| Speaker| Life And Business Coach. All rights reserved.

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